Hares; The Duchess of Cambridge and Lonely
Location; Laigueglia, Italy
Date; Sunday 1st. October 2017
The Only Way is Up
Just wish it was this simple.
The wonderful weekend continues with the R.A. ensuring just enough cloud cover to ensure ideal running weather. Just how many will actually run though ? Or even thought they were running. 
The big headache of the weekend has been fixed and I do not mean the one caused by the excessive alcohol, but how to allocate excess passengers to a finite number of vehicles. All those that want to be at the Sunday Hangover Run site are all present and correct. (Nearly). And even a few that didn’t want to be there. They went walkabout until it was either circle, or food time.
Eventually, we were all safely assembled, raring {shome mistake there Ed } to go. The runners set off to the West and we (the L.W.B.) Ladies Walking Brigade, headed East, meandering in and out of the quaint, seaside, touristic fleshpot which is a seething mass of oiled flesh, cooking on the beach, in the height of Summer. We more, or less, had the narrow streets to ourselves though, and, as we were meandering at only a slightly faster speed than the local inhabitants, not causing any problems. This is the in-trail for the runners and I expect they will be moving a little faster than us!
The runners by now having completed their warm up loop and going through a sneaky 180 degrees with a few false trails find themselves on the walkers trail. This joyful scenario on the flat lasted until the next check where we headed inland and up. This seems to be a recurring theme of the weekend. Soon clear of the houses and we were looking down upon them as we go around the contour, go up, go back along another contour, go up, back along the contour and so on until, eventually we reach a high check. Really high, above the wonderful, old Church, at the end of the Bay with the picture postcard scene spread out below us in all it’s full panoramic glory.
The Hare told me, it looks much better with the sun out, blue sea and sky, as it was when they reconnoitred the run.
(They reconnoitre the run site? Ed.)
Now I know why I Hash, it makes the Hangover seem worthwhile. We are faced with a choice of down, or more up, up a small mountain footpath which is the obvious way as Jack Rabbitt and Bravefart are calling us all “on,” from the dizzy heights above – Bastards. False trail. At least those two will behind us now. We are now returning, zig zagging our way down towards sea level to join the walkers/sick/infirm and weak willed trail. This being the walkers trails out of town and the runners way back to beer. The L.W.B. taking a direct B to A route back along the seafront and the FRB’s running a series of loops in and out of the town, in the narrow streets, startling the promenading Italians wrapped up warm as it is now October 1st. Time to get the long trousers, gilet and scarf out of storage! Then before we know it another 6km/4km trail marked off and one more the add to my total with the RH3 which means I will soon have enough runs/walks under my belt for my personalised, engraved, pewter mug.
Thank you Colgan’s Beer for The Pirate Beer;
Coincidence or what?
CIRCLE; Down Downs awarded to recognise the efforts, stupid or otherwise, and to reward with a degree of thanks all those so honoured.
Some of those I can remember;
Hares; The Duchess and Lonely
AirBnB in their room, subletting……….Cumalot, Heavy Pants, Perpetual Motion
Modern Fairy Tale; The Duchess explaining how he had an extremely erotic dream, or so he thought, only to wake up with a gold ring in his bed which, although not belonging to a princess, did in fact belong to the next best thing…..a harriette called Sarah Come Lately.
Short Cutting; Jack Rabbit and Bravefart. They did not like being at the back after their false trail and being competitive Bastards wanted to be at the front again.
Getting all excited and spilling beer; Jobsworth
Only person to find Saturday’s trail; Pissoles
Not running, (But very ablely stood in a Beer Bitch) Pullit
Style Guru; Sadist
Magic Staff; Wedgie and The Duchess
Locking his wife, Not Stupid, out of their room. (Is this so his invitee could scarper over the balcony? Ed.) Gorgeous Edna
Swimmers, too many to remember and for Shaving in Public, Numbskull,
Prison Skills; Lonely, smuggling 50 Polo Shirts. (Must have been one hell of a giant condom, Ed.)
Drank his reward from a Condom.
RESTAURANT – Pretentious but good. Who needs to serve olive oil and balsamic vinegar in test tubes? (did you spill yours? – Ed-209)
Then all too soon time to kiss everybody goodbye and resolve to get fit before we do it again next year.
Praise was given to those with their heads above the parapet and a big thank you must also go to all those behind the scenes to ensure a smooth running event and also to the participants for creating a warm and friendly environment.
Thank you all.
You know who you are.
All Hashers are your friends it is just that you haven’t met them all yet!
And if you do not like this scribe’s effort………………………
